An evening with Ms Mallika Sarabhai
Introduction
On February 21, we had an engaging session by Ms Mallika Sarabhai, one of India’s leading choreographers and dancers. Her name is synonymous with artistic brilliance and social transformation. She is the co-director of the prestigious Darpana Academy of Performing Arts, an institution she has guided for nearly 30 years. She has created and performed an impressive repertoire of classical and contemporary works that have captivated audiences worldwide.
About Ms Mallika Sarabhai
Ms. Mallika Sarabhai is the daughter of the legendary classical dancer Mrinalini Sarabhai and the pioneering space scientist Dr. Vikram Sarabhai. Armed with an MBA from IIM Ahmedabad and a PhD in Organizational Behavior, Ms Sarabhai has seamlessly blended intellect, artistry, and advocacy in her multifaceted career.
Ms Sarabhai first made a name for herself in India as a film actress before earning recognition as an exceptional young dancer in Bharatanatyam and Kuchipudi. She won the first of her many awards when she was just 18 years old. Her global acclaim soared when she portrayed Draupadi in Peter Brook’s The Mahabharata, performing across continents for five years in both French and English.
Ms. Sarabhai has also been a crusader for societal education and women’s empowerment. In 1989, she broke new ground with her hard-hitting solo theatrical work, Shakti: The Power of Women, the first in a series of powerful productions addressing critical issues. Her performances—such as Sita’s Daughters, An Idea Named Meera, and Kadak Badshaahi—have been staged globally, to raise awareness and advocate for change.
In the mid-1990s, Ms. Sarabhai ventured into creating her own contemporary dance vocabulary, crafting works that have been showcased in North America, Scotland, Singapore, China, Australia, and India. Through Darpana Communications, she has also spearheaded impactful television programming on women’s empowerment, environmental consciousness, and public health, with over 3,000 hours of broadcast content.
Here are some of the awards and recognitions received by Ms Sarabhai:
1. Padma Bhushan (2010) – Conferred by the Government of India for her contributions to the arts.
2. Golden Star Award (1977) – Awarded for Best Dance Soloist at the Theatre de Champs Elysees, Paris.
3. Gaurav Puraskar – Awarded by the Government of Gujarat for her contributions to drama and dance.
4. Chevalier dans l'Ordre des Palmes Académiques (2005) – Conferred by the French Government for her contributions to drama and dance.
On what people across the world have in common today
It is fear and insecurity. It is the insecurity that we are not good enough unless we use, buy, flaunt or own something. It is the insecurity that governments feed to us by saying that “the other person will come and get us”. It is the insecurity of an uncertain future because of climate change, civil unrest, and religious animosity. It is the fear of losing everything we have. In India, it is the fear of being shamed by society.
On why fear and shame take centre stage
Either consciously or through circumstances, we all do things that we want to hide. It could be something we have done or lies we have spoken. Often, we have one public face and another private face. We are ashamed that we will be found out.
Two occurrences in Ms Sarabhai’s childhood determined how she would deal with fear, shame and insecurity.
Ms Sarabhai was 5 years old, her first day in a Montessori school. The students were seated in a circle and asked to draw a face on a piece of paper. She drew a face with the ears in the wrong place. The boy sitting next to her called her an ass. She got very upset, and after reaching home, told her father, she was not going back to that school again. After hearing what had happened, her father responded: “You know that you're not an ass. That poor little chap sitting next to you can't tell the difference between a donkey and a little girl. It's not a reflection on you.”
When she was 12 years old, Ms Sarabhai was in Shreyas, a school run by her father’s elder sister. The school had children of East African Gujaratis who had returned during this time from Idi Amin’s Uganda. A few boys fought over whose girlfriend she was. One of them knifed another. Her aunt, the principal, called her father to discuss her behaviour.
Ms Sarabhai sat outside fuming because she knew that she had done nothing. She didn't even know these boys. Finally, her father came out grinning from ear to ear. After reaching home, she complained that it was all very unfair. She was unhappy that her aunt did not believe her, and she had nothing to do with the boys.
Her father said, “Listen, Mallika. All of us must take a decision: whether we want to follow the rules of society, which are often very restrictive, based on lies, based on patriarchy, and a hierarchical structure, where the upper classes and the upper castes make rules to keep the others down. Or we must take a decision like your mother, and I that we will find our own truths. And it's not easy, because you get stoned all the time and you get abused. But we have decided that that is the path we will follow. Think about whether you want to follow the rules of society which will make you very acceptable. Or you want to find your own truth. “
Ms Sarabhai remembers going away and thinking about it for 3 days and coming back to her father and saying that she would find her own truths. She did not care what society would say. She was sure she would be strong enough to take the abuses and the stones.
These two conversations with her father more than anything else have led to the life Ms Sarabhai has led, to the battles she has fought and continues to fight. They have also led to every major decision she has taken.
Ms Sarabhai went into films very early. She decided that whatever the consequences, she would not hide anything she did. She started smoking. Gujarat Samachar, a leading Gujarati newspaper reported that she did not even have the discretion to smoke in secret. But she decided that she would not be a hypocrite and have skeletons in her cupboard. So, in every interview she has given over the last 40 years, (when her marriage was breaking up, when she was going through a depression or when she was going through a non-creative phase,) she has been transparent. So nobody could come and keep her quiet by threatening to spill the beans.
All of us have this question to face. If we are living in fear of being found out, how do we let ourselves blossom? How do we make ourselves smell the flowers every day? How would we be able to speak our mind, to follow dharma and truth in a world that is built on lies and corruption?
So, if there is anything that Ms Sarabhai has followed in her life, it is these truths. It's been hard. She has gone against the Government. She has had false cases piled up against her. She has spent many years going to the police station every day out on bail just for speaking the truth and speaking for people who she thought were being exploited, killed, made voiceless. She continues that despite being under siege. Her institution is under siege but continues to function.
On grooming children
Ms Sarabhai feels that we bring up children to be slavish to their books, never to learn or question. When we are 18-20, our parents decide we should get married. In most cases they decide who we should marry, when we should marry and how much the wedding will cost. The minute we are married, they start asking when the baby is arriving. When the baby arrives, the parents decide what it will be named, which school it will go to, what clothes it will wear, what subjects it will take, which college the child will go to, which job the child will take, whether the child will take up a job or not. And when they are of marriageable age, children get married, without having taken a single decision for their own lives in their entire life. They become parents, and the whole treadmill begins again.
So, unless we teach our children, to be inquisitive, to take a moral stand, to be able to cogently sit across the table and talk about what the pros and cons of anything are, how can we expect a thinking public?
Ms Sarabhai remembers, as the youngest member of the family, getting into decision making about things that concerned all four of them: her brother, parents, and she. Often, she would take a completely contrarian point of view. The rule was that it would not be a majority decision but a unanimous one. Her parents or her brother would take her through the alternatives and make her see the pros and the cons. Sometimes the process would go on for days. But it was not a waste of time. She was trained to take an ethical stand about everything, not just sit on the fence.
What Ms Sarabhai does through her work is to open a window so that people realize that they are following scripts that somebody else has written for them. A parent is unhappy that he couldn’t become an engineer. So, the child is forced into becoming an engineer. A parent is frustrated by not living the good life. So, the child is sent away to a better future to another country where many of them do not have better lives.
When do we ask children their opinion? When do we give them the tools so that they blossom into thinking individuals who will be able to have a conciliatory dialogue, without violence? We don't have dialogues in this country. We have a situation where,” if I am right, you must be wrong”. And we are seeing the results of that. We are seeing violence. Ahimsa, in thought and deed, has completely gone from our country.
Concluding remarks
Today, the upper classes and the educated classes don't talk of dowry. But they can have a wedding that goes on for 5 days, with 1,000 people are put up in a 5 Star Hotel, or flown somewhere for a destination wedding. If this is not dowry in another form, what is it?
When we have this need to prove ourselves by what we own, is that not a submergence of self-choice? How can we learn to find our own truth? How can we learn to be honest with ourselves? We are frightened of even asking ourselves: Am I satisfied? Am I happy? We do not want to be the odd one out.
We must do something. We must think about it at least, and not just go from one step to the next like a baggage train that just passes and passes and passes.
Ms Sarabhai believes that if somewhere she has opened an alternative in the minds of people and enabled them to think differently or at least to question, what they are doing, her work is successful.
Q&A
For the past 2 or 3 generations, Ms Sarabhai’s family has been actively involved in first the Independence movement and then in nation building.
While she was growing up as a young child, the talk at the weekly dinner table was always about societal change. There was no time for trivial talk such as buying clothes and jewellery. Everybody was building institutions. Her father was building IIM Ahmedabad. Her uncle and aunt were starting the National Institute of Design and bringing in world famous designers. The conversations focused on how to transform lives.
She and her brother Kartikeya saw her father using the language of science and her mother using the language of arts to brighten the lives of people. She grew up seeing her mother staging performances that talked of dowry, violence, atrocity against Dalits, the potential destruction by the proposed Silent Valley Hydro project. Her father’s life was not about sending a mission to the Moon or Mars. It was about how space technology could bring science and health and education to the most marginalized people of India.
As children, Ms Sarabhai and her brother were always encouraged to be present and take part in the conversation when some Nobel laureate or philosopher visited their home. They had the privilege of going with their parents to conferences.
Ms Sarabhai realized that this privilege had to be paid forward. She started thinking how she could become a voice for those who did not have a voice. And how she could fight for justice, for people who were too marginalized, or too poor or too frightened for their livelihoods or their families to ask for justice.
So, in many ways, it was just the thing to do for Ms Sarabhai and her brother. They didn't think of an alternative. They thought this was what they were there for in this life. And they would do it with passion and joy.
In some ways the new generation faces a terrifying time and in other ways, a very exciting time. Terrifying because in a few years, we probably will not have clean air to breathe or clean water to drink. Exciting, because today the possibility exists that we can meet the expectations of parents and still have enough time to pursue our passion. We can take care of societal debts, familial debts, and still have 30 or more years to do what we really want to do. The kind of work we can do today and the kind of incomes we can generate today, makes it possible to discharge our obligations quickly. We can nurture our passion till then and let it grow after our obligations are fulfilled.
Ms Sarabhai provided an example. Suppose someone is a passionate musician. She can continue with music as a hobby. She can work for 20 years to fulfil all her obligations towards her family. She would still be only 40. Having fulfilled her obligations, she could allow her musical talents to blossom and be who she wants to be.
Teenagers should also start having conversations with their parents on important topics. What does marriage mean? What does happiness mean? What do I think I will be? These conversations are necessary for society to change slowly. Children must educate their parents.
Outside Darpana there are benches where all the mothers sit. The course is for 7 years. So, the same mothers (who accompany their children) sit outside the class every day 3 times a week for 7 years. One day, about 15 years ago, Ms Sarabhai asked these women: Do you want to learn dancing? After some initial self-doubt, they said yes. So today, in the 1st year class, we have 7-year-olds, and 55-year-olds. (The synergies are remarkable. The 55-year-olds have the understanding to explain to the 7-year-olds. The 7-year-olds have the physical ability and the memory to do the dances skilfully.)
The transformation in the families of these women is so heartening. Children call from abroad and say they will pay the fees if their fathers do not. A husband might come to her and say: “My wife wakes up with a smile, wants to come to the class and stands in front of the mirror practicing. I didn't know I was married to this woman. “
Now, if we can give this kind of opportunity to young people as well to allow their talents to blossom. What more gift of life can we give?
As leaders, we should be passionate about what we do. We can be strict about the work being completed. But we should also let people know that they can always come to us with a problem, be it about themselves, their spouses or their child. So, Ms Sarabhai is sister, mother, boss, friend rolled into one for her colleagues. People get inspired seeing her do everything from top to bottom and not believing in a hierarchy.
We must have the ability to say we love or admire someone and not postpone it till we have time. We should be able to live in the moment. We should not postpone things till we retire or when we have enough money or after the children have married. Life is now, at this instant.
It is never too late to start a conversation with our family members. We should throw our phones away. We should not be carried away by the number of followers we have on the social media. We must have one person we can hug, one person on whose shoulder we can put our head down and one person, we can hold our hand and cry or laugh. It is worth everything else.
We need to ask ourselves: What is life? Is it about our career? Is it about making money. If we have kids, we should give our time to them. Otherwise, we should not have kids.
Life is short. Do we really want to be the richest person in the world? And we will probably find that as we burn ourselves trying to accumulate more wealth, our daughter has run away, or our son has made a suicide attempt.
Ms Sarabhai has always loved to learn. Even as a child, when her father was establishing IIM Ahmedabad, she was determined to get admission. Her father felt happy on hearing this. Unfortunately, he passed away just the day before the CAT exam. Ms Sarabhai was persuaded by her friends to write the exam, and she got admission. After a tough first year, she did very well in the second year and finished with good grades. She was inspired by the work of Prof David McLelland who was visiting IIM Ahmedabad at that time. He had pioneered the three needs theory: need for power, achievement and affiliation.
After her MBA, Ms Sarabhai decided to do research. Harvard gave her admission but asked her to come back 10 years later as she was too young. IIM Ahmedabad made things difficult for her and insisted that she should start form the first year of the MBA program. So, she went to the Gujarat University and in the company of likeminded people finished her PhD. Her research question was why Indians are so corruptible.
B Schools should be teaching students to be ethical and to be concerned about society. But they are only teaching students how to compete and succeed individually. That is a huge failure, and has led us to the world we are in. We need to explain to students that it is only in the common good that personal good can happen.
IIM Ahmedabad started failing Dr Vikram Sarabhai’s dream very early. Even in her batch, which was only the 9th batch, IIMA was turning out people to go into companies to make money. Not more than three students of her batch of 200 went into doing something other than making money. Today, it might not even be 3 out of 800.
The mandate must be to enable students to search for truth and take personal responsibility for what is happening around us, in the companies, to the shareholders, and to the consumers.
Teachers must be given the freedom to say they do not have an answer. Teachers and the students should look for the answer together. In the Guru Shishya Parampara (about which we Indians are very proud), Gurus never accepted that they did not know something. That's why Darpana, does not believe in the Guru Shishya Parampara. Often students ask Ms Sarabhai a question, and she might say:” I don't know. Let's look it up.”
Knowledge is becoming obsolete every day. Why can't educators learn to have the humility to say: Let us do it together? This attitude will spill over to the workplace when students join their employer. They will also say to their colleagues, “Let's do it together. Let's find out together.”
Brain science has proved that physical activity releases a lot of oxytocin and serotonin. But physical activity with music, which is dance, leads to even more of these chemicals being released in us. This makes us feel relaxed, good, and happy inside. If we simply lead the children to dancing, they will become addicted. Let them have fun. It does not matter what kind of dancing they do.
Bharatanatyam is the most nuanced and the most sophisticated language from which lots of other dance forms have come. Bharatanatyam wins hands down over other dances.
When Ms Sarabhai started dancing, there were some who remarked: “Mallika is too beautiful to go into dancing. Why should she go into movies.?” She was upset and cut out the newspaper article, made a boat and sank it in water. If the criticism is justified, Ms Sarabhai will certainly think about it. Otherwise, she will mentally make a boat and sink it in water.
When the criticism is misplaced, we should be resilient and have conviction in what we do. For instance, when Ms Sarabhai took a position against Mr. Modi, when he was chief minister of Gujarat, after the Gujarat riots, she was called the whore of the Muslims. Some people even remarked that Dr Vikram Sarabhai must be turning in his grave to have a daughter who spoke like this. This could have destroyed her. But she knew what the truth was. She was going to shout that truth from the rooftops whether she was heard or not, because that is what she believed she had to do.
Early on in her career, Ms. Sarabhai believed she was highly creative and aspired to create impactful work, particularly for women. She drew inspiration from various sources but initially struggled to find direction and became frustrated in her creative pursuits.
One of her friends told her that if she was clear about what she wanted to do, she should get started.” You must just sit and wait for it to come. You will write. It might take a month. It might take 5 months. But you must force yourself to just sit there and say, I need to create this. I need to create something that I feel passionate about. And if you fail, you fail. If it's not good enough, you try again. And if it's good enough, then you say what next?”
And that's how Ms Sarabhai’s career became what it did through sheer frustration and an inability to think that she could do something.